Love Yourself First!!
I finally got to watch the much-awaited British comedy/ drama movie “The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel”
It’s nice to see such wonderful passionate actors in a different light – the story revolves around a disparate group of English retirees, who abandon they homeland to look forward to a much deserved, much awaited and seemingly luxurious vacation in Jaipur, India. As usual in our good old India – nothing is as promised, becox the so called seeming lavish hotel is badly in need of repair.
However disappointed (phones not working, no doors, birds in the room, constant leaking of the taps) and however troubled (spicy meals) they seem, somehow time seems to heal and provide comfort to all the seven British pensioners.
The characters are quite colorful, especially Judi Dench as a widow in financial straits after her husband’s death and the loyal if unhappily married husband (sweet and funny) and his perpetually dissatisfied wife (uff!). Not to forget the enthusiastic attitude of the hotel’s manager Sunny (Dev Patel), the entrepreneur behind the whole mess. (who doesnt want to give up his dream rather his father’s dream also inspite of his mothers persuasive nature for him to move to Delhi.
The moral of the story is – Everyone knows to love. Everyone knows its ok to dream and Everyone knows when to let go of things that no longer belong to you. Lovely soundtracks and it has one of the best quotes I’ve heard in some time – “Everything will be all right in the end. So if it is not all right, then it is not yet the end”
A quick sneak peak : http://www.imdb.com/rg/s/4/title/tt1412386/#lb-vi929996313
Disagreements are a part of human nature and though they can be tiring at times, if they are handled properly they can be settled with no long term damage to a relationship. Almost always, it is not topic of the argument but lack of any ground rules that make things spiral out of control.
First and foremost is the way you approach an argument, an argument occurs when two people have differing opinions on a topic, each believing that they are right. Unfortunately people approach the argument looking for control or for staking their claim to be right rather than looking for a resolution where all parties are heard and opinions debated. Remember this is a relationship not a full body contact sport like wrestling where there has to be a clear winner.
Some specific points to follow are:
Privacy matters – No arguing in public, the argument is between the two of you and that is where it remains.
The past is the past – We all have made mistakes, an argument is not the right time to bring them up. Keep the argument relevant – old grudges should be left out
Don’t make it personal – Stay focused on the topic, you have an issue and sort it out – Don’t start on personal traits, if it is relevant to the topic, then approach it in a different manner that shows how you are affected by it rather than exclaim the personality trait over and over.
Is anybody listening ?– Make an effort and listen to what your partner is trying to say – sure you might think that it has all been said before and you know what it’s all about but you really might not have a clue. Besides it lets the other person vent, and perhaps that it what is really required.
Graceful exits – The ending of an argument is critical to a relationship, notice if your partner is trying to end the argument and accept it – It could be in the form of a joke in the middle of an argument or an action such as walking back into an argument they just ran out on.
Importance scale– People disagree all the time, is everything you disagree about that important to you that you need to get mad all the time or is it something that you can let slide and leave it for the important stuff.
Watch the clock – It is an argument not a war – there has to be a time limit – If you feel that you are going around in circles, let it go and cool down. Come back to it another time.
Communication is the key in any relationship and it is the lack of it that causes friction.
People tend not to speak when something small upsets them under the guise of not wanting to create issues but these small things tend to build up resentment in one and usually an extremely small incident occurs that causes your partner to face the full wrath of your fury. At this point the other person is wondering what was that important that caused all this to happen and blames you back for getting mad all the time . So next time don’t let things build up and explode – Talk people ! Talk!
And most importantly prioritise, and do not sweep it under the rug!
Since tomorrow is a beginning of a new month, a new day, a new start and the most popular resolution is “Losing weight”. I thought the link below can be of help to myself and the rest of the peeps out there. Although my favorite list of foods is on the last half of the page.. wonder how i will give up any of those or even cut down… But there is nothing that is not achievable, just needs the right kind of drive and commitment to accomplish it.. Have a Fab New Feb month!!
I guess I should start thinking about New Year resolutions… maybe something about not procrastinating… Well even if you have not so far – no worries because you can always start your New Years with the Chinese New Year.
Yes, we have entered the year of Dragon, According to the Chinese Calendar – There are 12 animal names; so by this system, every 12 years these year names are repeated.. Those born in dragon years are Innovative, Brave, Passionate, Enterprising, Flexible, Self-assured, Conceited, Tactless, Scrutinizing, Unanticipated and Quick-tempered.
I am sure everyone wished they were born in the year of the Dragon, well I will help you and you can see the following are the years of the Dragon
Fifth in the cycle, Dragon Years follows the Rabbit and recur every twelfth year. It is the sign of Luck and the Chinese name is LONG.
1904 * 1916 * 1928 * 1940 * 1952 * 1964 * 1976 * 1988 * 2000 * 2012
Legend has it that in earliest eras, Buddha asked all the animals to come together to meet him on Chinese New Year. Twelve of them came, and hence Buddha named a year after each one of them.
Dragons are referred to as the divine mythical creature that brings with it ultimate abundance, prosperity and good fortune. Dragons occupy a very important position in Chinese mythology. It clearly shows in their various paintings, art, literature, poetry, architecture, song, and many aspects of the Chinese conscience. The origin of Chinese dragons is unknown, but certainly pre-dates the written history. Its benevolence signifies greatness, goodness and blessings.
I suggest you buy, hang or paint a Dragon for your home this year. It is a symbol of good fortune and sign of intense power.
Unlike the negative energies associated with Western Dragons, most Eastern Dragons are beautiful, friendly, and wise. The Oriental Dragon is regarded as a divine beast – the reverse of the malicious monster that Westerners felt necessary to find and slay. In Eastern philosophy, the Dragon is said to be a deliverer of good fortune and a master of authority. Therefore, those people born in Dragon years are to be honored and respected.
If you are in a relationship – Dragons will give into love, but won¹t give up their independence. Because they have quick, sometimes vengeful tempers, their partners need to be tough-skinned. Dragons enjoy others who are intriguing, and when they find the right partners, they¹ll usually commit to that person for life.
Dragons also seemed more content at outside than at home – so good luck people taming your Dragons!!
Wishing everyone a very Happy Chinese New Year and let the resolutions begin…